[HugglescoteGrower]

Finally, just after Easter that next call came. The new plots were ready, and if I could make my way down to the allotments the following Sunday morning, sometime after 9:00am I would be sorted out with one.

9:00am! Is it light at 9:00am on a Sunday? Never mind, despite the ungodly hour I was determined to be there on the stroke of nine in order to pick the best plot. The alarm clock was set.

I woke up that Sunday morning feeling like Christmas had come again, what time is it? 6:30 my wife replied, go back to sleep .......

What time is it now? 6:45, go back to sleep .......

7:10 ..... 7:30 ...... five past Eight!

That's it, I had waitied long enough. I carefully chose some allotment type clothes, and after a quick breakfast I was on my way at 8:40

It is a two minute walk to our allotments, so I was perhaps a fraction early, but never mind. As it turns out, I was not early enough, and the two plots nearest the path were already taken, bug**r. The new ground had been divided into roughly "half" size plots, about 9 meters by 15 I was told. I could take one, or if I felt up to it could take two, but that would be a lot of work. My mind calculated the numbers quickly. Two plots would be almost exactly the size I had planned to, plus if it turned out to be too much for a start I would work into the extra space. so two plots in a line it was.

The plots looked ideal, bare soil ready dug for me to start my allotment empire. I did listen to the words very weedy, ploughed, half price this year, lot of work. None of them really sank in, neither did their implications as I gazed across my patch of earth, mentally placing my greenhouse and as yet non existant shed in their proper places.

And so I paid my fees, took my gate key and once again headed off home to begin my shoppping list  ......

[HugglescoteGrower]

My shopping list consisted of lots of green polythene twine and 2 foot split canes, with which I could mark out my master plan on the ground, two dozen 8 foot bean canes, runner bean seeds, pea seeds and a very long tape measure.

And so, the following weekend we, (we being myself and the good lady) began our master plan. First things first, to measure the plot accurately. The first thing that became obvious was that it is not square. One end is 29 feet wide, the other is 33 feet, and overall the two plots total 110 feet long. My initial plan would work well I decided.

My plan was to create 8 individual plots, each of four 12 x 4 beds, with paths between. 4 would be given over to vegetables allowing a four season rotation, one to soft fruit, one to fruit trees leaving me two to use for cut flowers, hops (I homebrew), and perhaps some sweetcorn.

Each "plot" would be twenty feet long and twelve wide, thus allowing a 3 foot wide path down the middle of the allotment, and a two foot wide path between me and the adjoining allotment. The other side joined a path anyway. Within each twenty feet would be 4 foot bed, 1ft path, 4 foot bed, 2 foot path, 4 foot bed, 1 foot path, 4 foot bed - 20 foot total. There would be four each side of the allotment, and they would be measuered two from each end, leaving the "spare" in the middle to site greenhouse, shed, water butts etc. So, are you still with me? No? Well trust me, it was all in my head.
So we started measuring, shoving in the canes at the corner of each bed, gradually marking out where the main paths would be, thus working out where it was safe to walk. The canes were gradually joined up wioth plenty of the green twine and the master plan started to take shape.

OK, somebody out there is already questioning the wisdom of all that twine, good spot, It will come back to haunt us .......

The following weekend, now into May, I made a start on the growing. The runner bean canes went up first. I had decided to plant a few seedlings bought from the nursery to get a head start, and the rest from seed. That would hopefully extend my harvest a little. And so 8 plants went on four canes, and the rest got three seeds each. I also sowed two rows of peas.

The choice of these first two crops was not random. My family love runner beans, though I am not keen.  A crop of runner beans would be the minimum requirement to justify my efforts in that first year. I love peas, raw, straight from the pod. I think I prefer raw peas to chocolate, and I am addicted to chocolate! So my first two crops were in.

Perhaps at this point I should have been slightly more concerned by the green tinge appearing across my plot than I was, but I would start hoeing next weekend ......

[Timebandit]

and 

[HugglescoteGrower]

Unfortunately, it's around this time that my master plan started to go the same way as Adolf's. His main problem was the RAF, mine was swine flu. And a real pig it was too.

In short, the latter half of may dissapeared, and it was not until June was well and truly here that I was well enough to return to my allotment.

Holy cow. I was met by a waste high sea of grass, which in closer inspection was well and tuly interspersed with bindweed, nettles, dock. There were brambles starting to reappear as well as one or two things I couldn't recognise. This was a big set back. My neighbour to one side had begun the laborious task of double digging her whole plot. Despite my recovery there was no way that I was in any shape to do that. And so my hsopping list was amended to include a petrol strimmer. Something had to be done, and the best I could think of was strim it down to three or four inches then spray it off.

It just so happened that Tesco were running a clubcard promotion, you could trade in one pounds worth of vouchers for 2 pounds worth of garden tokens to spen online at Tesco direct. So £50 of clubard tokens became a new McCulloch split shaft petrol strimmer. We opted to collect from a nearby strore next day. A visit to Wilkinsons yielded a litre of their own glyphosate weedkiller, and the battle began.

Strim & Spray, Strim & Spray, Strim & Spray. Now you rmember all those many, many yards of green polythene twine that originally marked out the ground plan? I swear to you that I had to disentangle every single yard of it from the strimmer head, it haviong become totally lost amidst the increasingly thick weed mat which covered the plot.

Note to self, if marking out in future use spray paint, not twine!

I had carefully weeded around the beans and peas, which were actually doing reasonably well. The biggest problem with them was that the bindweed had taken even more of a liking to my bean canes than the beans had. Thankfully the stems are quite different, so I tackled the problem by snipping the bindweed stems back to ground level, and leving them on the canes to die off naturally.

Do you know how long a bindweed can live despite being cut from it's roots? Eventually they wilted away leaving my beans to look almost like a real gardeners.

Eventually the policy of strim and spray started to show results, but the year was now moving on. The time was here to start planting the over wintering vegetables, but it was clear that the ground was still a long way short of being ready.

I was harvesting a good crop of runner beans, though my peas proved disapointing. They had come second to the weeds, and a close third to the local pigeon population. Why is it that pigeons eat my pea seedlings, but not the weed seedlings? Sod's law that one.

I had managed to relocate my Greenhouse, and more tesco clubcard points had been turned into a small metal shed, which waits to be erected. It was at this point that I decided that covering the whole plot would be the best way forward. And so egan the sea of black polythene that was to eventually engulf my allotment. I bought a roll 50 meters by 4, and decided that i would cut it down to cover each 20 x 12 bed. My garden was scoured for anything suitable for weightinh the stuff down. Thanksfully some alterations in the garden led to a concrete path being brocken up, so rubble bags became the main stay, with bricks and unused rockery stone providing intermediate support.

I did manage to lay the slabs for the shed base, and invested in a couple of IBU style water butts. I also decided that before I finished covering everything in polythene, it would be a good idea to rotovate the site. And so the search for a rotovator began .......

 

[Slowgrind]

MORE! 

[southwells farm]

ready for the next page turn...

[HugglescoteGrower]

And so, with my final bean crop of year 0.5 harvested, the canes came down, and with black sheeting starting to cover the ground on such a scale that I'm sure they were watching me from the ISS, I turned my thoughts to rotovators.

I have two previous experiences with rotovators, or should I say one with a rotovator and the other with a tiller, there is, as many of you will know a very serious difference. I did own a tiller once, a horrid thing without wheels of any kind, with it's engine mounted above the tines. A horrid thing that would bounce and spit and fly out of your grip if it were to hit stones, or uncultivated ground. I gave up with it and in the same way that it was passed on to me, because the previous owner couldn't cope with it, I too passed it on in similar circumstances.

The rotovator I had used on the other had was a fine piece of kit. Hired, many years ago, at not inconsiderable expense this thing was a beastie. I'm not quite sure what it was, but I'm guessing a howard, or something in that style. Big, very heavy and very stable. It pulled itself along and required just a little effort to keep it straight. It dug down into the soil under it's own power, even the tough compacted stuff, and pulled itself along at a steady pace. Given the time i could dig a whole field with such a machine.

We are lucky to have a very large grouncare machinery shop in a nearby village. Everything from tiny petrol strimmers and mowers to near agricultural machines, the ideal place to take advice. And so I did. Thankfully I took the afformentioned good lady with me and she was able to gather me up from the floor when it was explained that the type of machine I longed for carried the price tag of a decent used Mercedes Benz.

I should explain at this point, that I had a cunning plan. So cunning you could pin a tail on it and call it a weasel. This was cunning of the Baldric standard.

You recall the "hatefull, spitting tiller" which I had passed on. Well the recipients were my sister and brother in law, who became the latest in a long line of unfortunates responsible for the care of this machine when they took an allotment a few years ago.  After a little fettling and 4 hours a day eight days a week at the gym they had to some degree tamed the beast, though I still heard mumblings of dissatisfaction from time to time. So a rotovator share was on the cards, and, after skilfull introduction the idea grew, until an "in principle" agreement was reached.

The trouble was what to buy. The object of my affections had been ruled out on price. Even a 50% share of a decent second hand Mercedes Benz was out of the question for my allotment. And so, inevitably, my attentions turned to ........... ebay.

Initially my thought was to get something second hand and have it serviced, as i know somebody in that line of work. An ex hire machine would be OK, as long as it was serviceable. I have had good experiences with ex hire equipment at our local cricket club. And being shared between a couple of allotments would be virtual retirement for such a machine.

And so my watch list began to grow. Howards mainly, but a few other behemoth type machines in varying state of cosmetic repair, but all listed as working well. None were nearby, but that didn't matter too much, we have the trailer .....

To say I was surprised at how much these old things were making is something of an understatement. The first one I watched passed £1200 before the final day of the auction. We are heading out of price range again, plus I was well short of convinced about spending that kind of money on a second hand machine I knew nothing about, and had no comeback on, on ebay, despite the long list of "AAA+ great Ebayer", "pleasure to deal with" intonements.

But, while I had been looking, I had wandered across the Chinese Rotovator, or as we now call it the "Wotowator". £360 delivered for the type of machine we were looking for, albeit with certain limitations and of course, a questionable heritage. We did look at other options, but as the next best, a Husqvana of similar design demanded a price tag of close on £1000, the decision had, in truth already been made. Even if this machine only lasts a handful of years it will have done it's job, and the availability of direct replacement engines on ebay for £89 was reassuring. If anything went wrong in that department at least, a recovery option was available. So, with the final terms of our Wotowator share now finalised the buy it now button was pressed, and £364.99 was sent on it's way to darkest Essex.

And so, with somewhat limited expectations we looked forward to the arrival of our new machine. All we could do now was wait ....

and wait ....

and wait ....

and wait ....

[HugglescoteGrower]

But what of the plot, whilst all this was happening?

I had by now received the comittee phone call asking if I was still interested in the allotment, as it was looking a little unkempt. True it was, but only in accordance with my now very heavily modified master plan. I assured Jim that I was, and resisited the urge for jocularity at what I had skilfully identified as an inappropriate time.

I had considered trying to convince Jim of the delights of nettle soup, and what a great job I had done to become self sufficient so quickly, but I don't think that would have gone down well. My policy of strim and spray (hand up those of you who are now humming to yourself "wimaway, wimaway, wimaway ......) was not having an effect, but it was not proving quite as devastating to my allotments indegenous flora as slash and burn seems to be in the developing world.

But the sheeting was my next line of attack, and that was well underway. To look more commited I decided at thius time to get the greenhouse frame up, and glaze it with as much glass as I have. A few panes sadly saw their demise during it's former life as my garden shed, and a few more met their waterloo as we attempted to take the thing down. untangling it from the rampant honeysuckle and ivy as we did so.

Second note to self. Attempting to catch panes of glass sliding off the top of a wobbly greenhouse ranks alongside bathing with an electric fire, in terms of life expectancy.

I did wonder to myself as I headed down to the plot just how many people had received Jim's "get it tidied up" phone call, as I observed a fair number of plots, both new and old, that looked somewhat less kempt than mine did. At least mine was only showing a spares covering of the last few, stubborn weeds that despite it all had resisted to glyphosate. Others were, it had to be said well on the way to jungle status.

In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps ......... sorry folks, I will get the damm song out of my head soon.

It was at this point that it came to light that a couple of my nearest neighbours had indeed given up, and I don't think it is coincidence that they were the two who adopted the most aggressive policy at the start. The double dig it all brigade. Of all the advice I was given when I started, the one piece I hold above al others is not to try and do too much, too soon. The truth of those wise words was now becoming apparent.

With the greenhgouse up and the water butts in place roughly in the middle of my plot my next job was the shed base. I had decided against buying the accompanying base when i go the shed. The shed was something like £119, with 20% off, so under a hundred pounds, paid for in tesco clubcard vouchers at the rate of two to one. The base was £69 on it's own. It would kind of dampen the deal. Besides, I had a shed load, literally, of old used slabs leaning against the house wall in that bomb site of a garden. I would take those down and give them a second chance to shine.

[vet]

Where'd you go

I wait.....

I wait.....

[braders]

April 11th...Planted all of my potatoes with Adam...a lovely and very warm sunny afternoon
May 1st ...Potted on Tomato seedlings with Molly

[goodegg]

lost it but now its found. liberation day 9/5 /10 been cleaning metal greenhouse for turkies will make new pens and coop.  built new chooks coop 1 and 2 now at home waiting fr cavalcade had lovelly roast dinner and shep had 2 pork chops to celebrate,with roast dinner as well.tomorrow going to clear more of greenhouse.and finish coop 1 coop 2 finished .pics to follow. going back to plot tonight to do some more.

[Aunt Sally]

This topic is closed.

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