The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!

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Blackpool rocket

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3840 on: February 07, 2020, 16:37 »
Just to keep things moving
cow dog.jpg

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Tenhens

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3841 on: February 07, 2020, 19:27 »
Just to keep things moving

Why can't I think of any 'cow' puns .  shouldn't 'moving ' be mooooooving???
Was the cow from Uddersfield on it's way to Jersey?
we also rescue rabbits and guinea pigs,grow own veg

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Plot 1 Problems

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3842 on: February 07, 2020, 19:41 »
Steady tenhens, you're milking those puns a little too much.

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JayG

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3843 on: February 07, 2020, 20:41 »
Perhaps butter to move on from these cheesey jokes, although I don't want you to think I'm unduly beefing about it.  ;)
Sow your seeds, plant your plants. What's the difference? A couple of weeks or more when answering possible queries!

One of the best things about being an orang-utan is the fact that you don't lose your good looks as you get older

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Growster...

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3844 on: February 08, 2020, 07:15 »
I'll steak my life on betting that it will get even lower...

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Blackpool rocket

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3845 on: February 08, 2020, 10:45 »
Right, that's it.
I'm Friesian you lot out....back on topic;

I was busy in my garden and the neighbour looked over the fence and said, "What are you doing?"

I said, "I'm putting all my plants in alphabetical order."

She replied, "Really? I don't know how you find the time."

"Oh that's easy," I said. "It's right next to the sage!"

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mrs bouquet

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3846 on: February 08, 2020, 11:11 »
Please can I have another joke for W.I. on Wednesday.  :D  Mrs Bouquet
Dux Femina Facti

Sometimes my mind wanders, if found please return.

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Blackpool rocket

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3847 on: February 08, 2020, 11:18 »
Anyway, now I'm sober I got a proper dog..............Oh.......hang on :ohmy: :ohmy:



pig dog.jpg

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Tenhens

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3848 on: February 15, 2020, 19:35 »
A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer , 'sorry' the landlord replies , we don't serve food.

What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
Bison.

Why are frogs so happy?
They eat whatever bugs them.

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Growster...

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3849 on: February 16, 2020, 21:53 »
Now we're happily out of the Common Market, being in Kent, we're getting French coal merchants calling on households around here!

Mrs Growster was somewhat surprised when Pierre-Henri knocked on the door and asked if we would like to buy some coal from their own mines, somewhere down near The Dordogne!

She - quite rightly - gently declined the offer as all he could say was...

"Vould vous like ze coal 'a la carte or cul-de-sac'"!

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John

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3850 on: February 16, 2020, 22:45 »
"Vould vous like ze coal 'a la carte or cul-de-sac'"!
GROAN :)
Check out our books - ideal presents

John and Val Harrison's Books
 

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Plot 1 Problems

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3851 on: February 17, 2020, 00:06 »

"Vould vous like ze coal 'a la carte or cul-de-sac'"!


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Blackpool rocket

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3852 on: February 21, 2020, 12:15 »
Barb was lying in bed one night. Larry was falling asleep but Barb was in a romantic mood and wanted to talk.

She said: "You used to hold my hand when we were courting."

Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep.

A few moments later she said: "Then you used to kiss me... "

Mildly irritated, Larry reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.

Thirty seconds later she said: "Then you used to bite my Neck..."

Angrily, Larry threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed.

"Where are you going?" Barb asked.

"To get my teeth!"

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Growster...

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3853 on: February 21, 2020, 17:47 »
Just a reminder to those who looted electrical goods in last year's riots...

...your 'One Year Manufacturer's Warranty' runs out soon.

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Tenhens

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Re: The Daily Funny - Give us a Laugh!
« Reply #3854 on: February 21, 2020, 20:01 »
Was captain Picard also reacting to the three ear Spock gag ??

 



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