[John]

i dig,you dig,we dig,he digs,she,digs,they dig,its not a beautiful poem,but its very deep.

Is the comma between she and digs significant? Perhaps I'm over thinking it.

[hillfooter]

i dig,you dig,we dig,he digs,she,digs,they dig,its not a beautiful poem,but its very deep.

Is the comma between she and digs significant? Perhaps I'm over thinking it.

Man! it's obviously the transcript from a beatniks conference

[John]

The Grim Reaper came for me last night, and I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner. Talk about Dyson with death.

Paddy says "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador."
"Really, ..." says  Mick "Have you seen how many of their owners go blind"

I woke up last night to find the ghost of Gloria Gaynor standing at the foot of my bed. At first I was afraid...then I was petrified.
 
The wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for the  worst. So I have been to the charity shop to get all her clothes back.

A mate of mine recently admitted to being addicted to brake fluid. When I quizzed him on it he reckoned he could stop any time.

I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave. As I was standing there I noticed 4 grave diggers walking about with a  coffin, 3 hours later and they're still walking about with it. I  thought to myself, they've lost the plot .....

My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to  our local pet shop and they were £70! "Blow this," I thought, "I can get  one cheaper off the web."

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not happy.

 I was driving this morning when I saw an RAC van parked up. The driver  was sobbing uncontrollably and looked very miserable. I thought to  myself, "That guy's heading for a breakdown."

[Growster...]

LOL John!

Some years ago a small rural town in Spain twinned  with a similar town in Greece. The  Mayor of the Greek town visited the Spanish town. When he saw the palatial  mansion belonging to the Spanish mayor he wondered how he could afford such a  house. The Spaniard said; "You see that bridge over there? The EU gave  us a grant to build a two-lane bridge, but by building a single lane bridge, with traffic lights at either end this house could be built".

The following year the Spaniard visited the Greek town. He  was simply amazed at the Greek Mayor's house, gold taps, marble floors, it was marvellous. When he asked how this could be afforded the Greek said; "You see that bridge over there?" The Spaniard replied; "No?"

[mumofstig]

 

[GTFC197]

Can you imagine working for a company that only has a little more than 635 employees, but, has the following employee statistics.
 
29 Have been accused of spouse abuse.
 7  Have been arrested for fraud.
 9  Have been accused of writing bad cheques.
17 Have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least two businesses.
  3 Have done time for assault.
71 Cannot get a credit card due to bad credit.
14 Have been arrested on drug-related charges.
 8 Have been arrested for shoplifting.
21 Are currently defendants in lawsuits.
84 Have been arrested for drink driving in the last year.
 
AND
 
Collectively, this year alone, they have cost the British tax payer £92,993,748 in expenses.
 
Which Organisation is this?
 
It's the 635 Members of the House of Commons.
 
The same group that cranks out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.
 
And just to top all that, they probably have the best 'corporate' Pension scheme in the country.

[davethespread]

i dig,you dig,we dig,he digs,she,digs,they dig,its not a beautiful poem,but its very deep.

Is the comma between she and digs significant? Perhaps I'm over thinking it.

no its not john,sorry fat fingers :blink:

[greetwellboy]

Not sure what to get the wife for Christmas?
Don't want a repeat of last years fiasco!
Last year I thought,shall I get her an i-pod?,then I thought I will  get her an i-phone.
then I thought I would get her an i-pad.
But I settled in the end to get her an........i-ron.
Not bad really,I was up and about in 10 days.
Still not walking straight thou!!!!!!!!!

[aelf]

i dig,you dig,we dig,he digs,she,digs,they dig,its not a beautiful poem,but its very deep.

Is the comma between she and digs significant? Perhaps I'm over thinking it.

no its not john,sorry fat fingers :blink:

Don't Call John 'Fat Fingers', it's not nice   

[John]

Don't Call John 'Fat Fingers', it's not nice   

 

[snowdrops]

Not sure what to get the wife for Christmas?
Don't want a repeat of last years fiasco!
Last year I thought,shall I get her an i-pod?,then I thought I will  get her an i-phone.
then I thought I would get her an i-pad.
But I settled in the end to get her an........i-ron.
Not bad really,I was up and about in 10 days.
Still not walking straight thou!!!!!!!!!

Why are you creased up

[greetwellboy]

oh ha ha snowdrops,,very good.

[davethespread]

three vampires walk into a pub on halloween,walk up to the bar and the bartender says,
"what will it be fella's."
the first one says"i will have a pint of blood please."
the second one says"i'll have a pint of blood too please barman."
and the third one says"i think i'll have a pint of plasma please."
so the barman says "so lets get this straight fella's that two bloods and a blood lite.

2

[GTFC197]

BAD PARROT

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary.

Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.

Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer.. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."

John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude.

As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke-up, very softly,

"May I ask what the turkey did?"



Merry Christmas!

[Growster...]

Excellent GT! ;0)