[rogerbodger]

I called the RSPCA today and said, "I've just found a suitcase in the woods containing four fox cubs."

"That's terrible," she replied. "Are they moving?"

"I'm not sure, to be honest," I said, "But that would explain the suitcase."

[cadalot]

 

[DD.]

When everybody on earth was dead and waiting to enter Heaven, God appeared and said, "I want the men to make two lines: One line for the men who were head of their household, and the other line for the men who were dominated by their women.

"I want all the women to report to St. Peter."

Soon, the women were gone, and there were two lines of men.

The line of the men who were dominated by their wives was 100 miles long and in the line of men who truly were heads of their household, there was only one man.

God said to the long line, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves; I created you to be the head of your household! You have been disobedient and have not fulfilled your purpose! Of all of you, only one obeyed. Learn from him."

God turned to the one man, "How did you manage to be the only one in this line?"

The man replied, "This is where Mrs Digger told me to stand."

[mumofstig]

 

[JayG]

Hope you had Mrs. Digger's permission to post that DD! 

[dugless]

Well I am the boss in my house and I have the wife's permission to say so.

[rogerbodger]

I received an email warning of the dangers of eating tinned ham, but I think it might be Spam

[rogerbodger]

I bought my wife a new belt and bag for Valentines Day ..... the Hoover works perfectly now

[Snoop]

I bought my wife a new belt and bag for Valentines Day ..... the Hoover works perfectly now

Crumbs, you're getting all romantic there rogerbodger. "My wife" and not "the wife"... 

[dugless]

Probably a slip of the tongue

[rogerbodger]

I need to be careful ..... it seems that I was getting caught up in all that Valentines Day stuff 

[rogerbodger]

It's good to hear on the news that supermarkets are moving daffodils away from the food aisles, a mate of mine ate a daffodil the other day and had to be rushed to hospital. The good news is that he'll be out in the spring



OK .... I'll get my coat

[Goosegirl]

I bought my wife a new belt and bag for Valentines Day ..... the Hoover works perfectly now

That's just given me the biggest laugh for a while!  Presume they were vacuum-wrapped?? 

[rogerbodger]

I bought my wife a new belt and bag for Valentines Day ..... the Hoover works perfectly now

That's just given me the biggest laugh for a while!  Presume they were vacuum-wrapped?? 

Groan! You're getting as bad as me, carry on like that and we'll clean up between us 

[FINN THE FORK]

six of the seven dwarfs are not happy