[andy135]

I think maybe me and my sense of humour don't belong here...............  

[Jamie Butterworth]

2 men in a butchers:
One says to the other "I bet you carnt jump and reach them two pieces of meat",
The other replied "No, the steakes are too high!"

Jack:
Why couldnt anyone called jack be a pilot, because when he was welcomed on boared and they siad "Hi Jack" everone thought there was a terorist attack.

Ill go get my coat

[Yorkie]

 

[greenun]

man falling with parachute problem meets man going up
'What happened to you?'
'Parachute problem , and you?'
'Fireworks'

[PennyS]

I think maybe me and my sense of humour don't belong here...............  

Oh they do 

[joyfull]

just so long as people remember we do have young children who read this forum and not just adults 

[agingchick]

I hope this ones ok I think you have to be a certain age to understand it

On the subject of Colonoscopies. ... Colonoscopies are no joke, but these
comments during the exam were quite humorous.... . A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients
(predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!

2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'

3. 'Can you hear me NOW?'

4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'

5. 'You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married.'

6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'

7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'

8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'

9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!

10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'

11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'

12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay.'

And the best one of all.

13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'

         

     

[Ice]

I love number 10.

Went for a colonoscopy last year.  The nurse took me into a room to do my blood pressure and asked If I would like a throat numbing spray before the procedure.  I said "Bl**dy hell, how long is the tube".   Thankfully she had got me muddled with someone else.

[DavidT]

Isn`t it normal practice to post pics on here?

[PennyS]

'orrible things!  I had one a couple of years back and really hope I don't have to have another one for a very very long time 

[Jamie Butterworth]

I dont know if this is allowed, but I just find Tim Vine so funny, so i thought id post a link to a clip of his.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPaZfeAYUyk

[Aunt Sally]

Oh Jamie - He's Tommy Cooper reborn

[DavidT]

Aunty, how can you compare him to that brilliant Welshman? Tommy Cooper made people laugh, that man didn`t even make me smile.

[Aunt Sally]

I must admit that Tommy cooper is one of my all time favourite comedians.

The way Tim Vine tells a joke is rather Cooperesque.  Lots more to Tommy than just jokes though

[Aunt Sally]

jar spoon spoon jar