[rogerbodger]

There once was a boy from Peru
Whose limericks stopped at line two

[mumofstig]

There once was a boy from Peru
Whose limericks stopped at line two

He can't find a rhyme,
though he looked for some time,
but that's strictly between me and you. 

[hamstergbert]

I once knew a fellow called Stan,
Whose limericks just wouldn't scan.
When told this was so
He replied, "Yes, I know,
But I always have this compunction to try and cram as many words into the final lines of 'em as I possibly can."

[aelf]

There was a man from Darjeeling,
Who boarded a bus bound for Ealing,
It said on the door,
Please don't spit on the floor,
So he stood up and spat on the ceiling.

Spike Milligan 

[JayG]

There once was a boy from Peru
Whose limericks stopped at line two

That's been making me chuckle all day for some reason. 

It can't be improved but I can't resist adding 2 more lines:

I find it outrageous
And pray not contagious...

[hamstergbert]

There was a surrealist called Dali,
A fish.

[mrs bouquet]

Oldies Thoughts - Brilliant - I would love to take that to WI tomorrow, but don't know how to print it off  Mrs Bouquet

If you highlight the text using your mouse, then copy and paste it into Word or Notepad (Windows) you can print it out from there.

Thanks for th print-out info, I got it copied and went along, then we ran out of time - another day, another dollar !!!!!!,  Thanks again, Mrs Bouquet

Edited to fix quotes.

[Paul Plots]

There once was a boy from Peru
Whose limericks stopped at line two

That's been making me chuckle all day for some reason. 

It can't be improved but I can't resist adding 2 more lines:

I find it outrageous
And pray not contagious...

Pity the boy from Peru
Who couldn't get past line 2

[John]

The Welsh NHS was not affected by the ransom software that has hit the English NHS. The Commodore 64 is a robust machine and continues to function as normal.

[mumofstig]

 

[DanielCoffey]

John, It is interesting to hear they finally upgraded from the Dragon 32 then. Faithfully providing computer resources to Wales since the 80s.

[John]

John, It is interesting to hear they finally upgraded from the Dragon 32 then. Faithfully providing computer resources to Wales since the 80s.

[rogerbodger]

I bought myself 2 jigsaws recently. I am pleased to report that I completed the first one in just over 2 weeks, quite an achievement as it said 3-4 years on the box. The other one is proving to be more difficult, it's made by a company called Kelloggs, has a picture of a tiger on the box, but all the pieces look the same and I have yet to find any black bits to match the tiger's stripes.

[Growster...]

I bought myself 2 jigsaws recently. I am pleased to report that I completed the first one in just over 2 weeks, quite an achievement as it said 3-4 years on the box. The other one is proving to be more difficult, it's made by a company called Kelloggs, has a picture of a tiger on the box, but all the pieces look the same and I have yet to find any black bits to match the tiger's stripes.

It's actually a cereal killer Roger...

Coat applied for...

[aelf]

The urge to sing 'A lion sleeps tonight' is just a whim away, a whim away, a whim away...